I am floored beyond belief. And this coming from someone who knows her floors!
Once the magic 500,000 follower mark occurred, it was like every reporter, radio host, and television station came through here, called on the phone, or e-mailed fatty. And naturally, you can understand my reaction to all that here:
Let me be clear – I don’t mean that I quit being on this fine establishment of a weblog, or writing to you, my own growing legion of Penny fans, or anything like that. I simply mean that I can no longer waste time trying to keep the little stump’s ego in check, or sabotage his photo ops, or do the funny thing where I draw a moustache on him with old catfood. OK, maybe the last one keeps going but I will not waste time on the rest of them. Fine, let the little Himbo become the flavor of the month and beloved by all. Those in the know will know where the real intelligence lies.
Fatty’s been all over the place, but he gave a particularly nice interview to a group of podcasters down the road – the Twooting Show. Here’s a link to that episode. And if you want to see fatty talk even longer, there’s a link to the video podcast of the interview. Probably the best of the bunch.
Meanwhile, an AP reporter did a story about Socks, and the thing about the AP, other than it stands for “Associated Press” and not “Analytical Paws” like it should, is that once you get an AP story out there, it ends up in all manner of outlets. Local newspapers, television websites, radio shows… literally hundreds of places picked up the “Socks Story” and went with it. Here’s the basic story that they all used. I overhead that phone conversation with Fatty – that writer was really friendly.
Also, in case anyone was wondering, there is a Sockington Facebook page out there. Here’s a link. 1,200 people think of themselves as “Fans”. I haven’t gone that far, I promise you.
Isn’t this crazy? While I’d love it if it was the Penny Posse out there, at least the next time someone offers him lifetime cat food or offers to fly him to a pet spa, I can convince them I’m part of his “entourage” and deserve the goodies too.
What else… ah, yes, I saved the best for last.
Socks was interviewed by a local Boston news program about his “accomplishment”, and… I got my big television debut! Best of all, everyone got to see my butt, which, if you know anything about the feline world, is our big way to wave hello. So without further adieu, allow me to link you to:
The madness must stop! What do I do? I’m reaching out here, people. How can people stop paying attention to this foolish little pop-star moron and begin sinking their teeth into some real culture and content, also known as myself? I’m thinking that the next thing to do is start answering phone calls coming in for you-know-who and either give them a brand new lede to run with or simply insist that I be billed as his representative. Seriously.
While I do admit I’m slow to adopt to new technology, never let it be said that this girl isn’t willing to give things a whirl, especially if it means more catfood. A company called “Twitshirt” has a service where people can point to twitter and have these various “tweets” printed on a shirt. Why would people do this? Beats me. But it has two things going for it: humans seem to love buying pointless t-shirts, and every shirt people buy goes to my paypal account, for later investment.
So if you go to Sockington’s Twitshirt page and browse around, you can have his tweets put on clothing for yourself. And I get paid! What could be easier?
Also, I do stress that it’s me getting paid here; Socks has no idea I’m doing this, and I think that’s for the best. Could you imagine what he’d buy if given half the chance? Best to keep the little nerd in the dark.
I can’t believe it… 300,000 followers, now. And for this new mass of followers, there’s a new video showing His Greyness dealing with an infernal machine. At least I make an appearance.
What I want to know is, where’s my big break? I think someone’s getting a claw-filled incentive to star me in the next video, maybe at 400,000 followers, which appears to be just around the corner.
One of the here-and-there questions posed to Sockington (and occasionally me) are about this mysterious, shadowy figure named “Baron Von Shakymouse” who seems to be Socks’ confidant, companion, toy and mentor. Some people have been curious simply because they don’t know what he is, while others think they do and want to know where they can get a Baron Von Shakymouse(tm) for their own little roommates.
The Baron is basically a small mouse-shaped toy that Socks keeps around, either trotting around with it in his mouth or wresting to the ground and leaving the scene of the crime like a triumphant wrestler. The difference between the Baron and other cat toys is he has a small item inside him (don’t ask me how this works) that makes a rattling noise. This drives Socks crazy, and when he’s anywhere in the house and Food Guy or Food Lady shake the Baron, Socks is immediately summoned. This is how they brought him to the vet the last half-dozen times.
Socks also plays fetch with the Baron, bringing him to a sleeping food person and dropping it, and then waiting for the Baron to sail through the air so he can run after his “prey”.
I don’t buy into any of this, by the way. I’m more of a fabric snake and rug kind of lady, myself.
And if this isn’t obvious, there isn’t one single Baron (although Socks may think so); he destroys them within a day, so a constant refreshing of Barons must be ensured for him. There must be thousands of half- or quarter- Barons scattered in every corner of this home. Sigh.
Over two hundred thousand people have been convinced to follow sockington’s twitter feed, which pretty much seals the deal for me as to mankind’s hopes for the future. All I can say is thanks to whoever invented canned food, because when the coming apocalypse comes, I expect one of the zombie slaves to be able to continue our regular feeding schedule.
The whole thought made me hungry, so I was off eating when Socks’ newest message to his army was released:
Socks asked his army to send in photographs and video. He only gave them 60 minutes with no warning to do so, but over 200 people responded. In fact, they followed the Cat’s Way by not limiting themselves to one or two photos, or photos just of cats, or anything else. It’s quite a collection in there. I thought I saw myself a few times, so I’m glad that when I finally make it official that I own this house, I have a couple other cats who can stand in for me at functions and during any potential coup attempts.
Seriously, he passed 223,000 earlier this morning. That means he’s on track to having a quarter of a million followers.
This morning, I woke up to discover that against all rhyme and reason, Socks now has over one hundred thousand followers. This is astounding – where did they all come from? Why did they choose to follow him? What possible means of trickery can I use to get them all to follow me? Why aren’t they following me now? What’s he got that I haven’t got? This has all the makings of a terribly pity party on my part. I decided to tell him I was commemorating his incredible achievement, but we all know the real story. Good thing he can’t read very well:
No doubt the press, Hollywood, and all sorts of crazy latchers-on will come out of the woodwork, but I think we can assume he’ll be the same old Socks, since dumb is dumb. I’ll do my best to stop him from signing any crazy contracts or agreeing to shill for some cat food or something. I wish I could say I was positive I’ll be successful.
The nice people who are deluded into liking Sockington (and myself, I assume) have been sending in greetings and photos to him this morning. Here’s a selection:
Quite a handsome bunch, I must say. Deluded, but handsome, beautiful cats. Maybe I don’t like cats in my own home, but when it comes to seeing them in general, I always appreciate a fine form.
Anyway, Socks has declared it Socks Day which sounds very fine and good but bear in mind he basically calls every day “Socks Day”.
Thanks, everyone, for putting up with him enough to enjoy my company.
When I started my own twitter feed to be able to give the other side of the story, I found the default backround drab and uninteresting. To my great delight, WaysideWaifs has provided me with an absolutely beautiful background icon! Thank you so much for thinking of me!
To celebrate 70,000 followers, Socks put together a pretty fun little music video. I say it’s fun because it shows off some of my superior fighting technique, and my enjoying a pleasant meal. Socks shows up as well. Thanks to all the new followers, even if you’re not following me.
Socks and Penny receive excellent medical care at the Weston Veterinary Clinic in Weston, MA, under the care of Dr. Neil Storey and the rest of the top-notch staff.
